A Year at 32 September Way Page 9

  Nicolette returned several minutes later. “I’m so sorry,” she said breathlessly. “I couldn’t find the matches anywhere for the longest time.”

  She passed them over to Eva to do the honors. “So, what did I miss while I was gone? Any juicy gossip?”

  Josh looked over at his wife, “Honey, I don’t think we all know one another enough yet to be sharing personal stories.”

  Eva walked around the table, moving from candle to candle. “Oh, it’s okay. Not much has happened with me, but I can tell you about a secret door in my apartment.”

  The others listened intently as she described her discovery and the uncovering of the secret door in her apartment wall. Carlisle enjoyed the looks on the others’ faces as Eva regaled them with her experience of walking through the darkened room. Carlisle’s gaze stopped when her eyes fell on Nicolette. Twinkling candlelight reflected off of everyone else’s eyes, showing their happiness and enjoyment. But the candlelight also revealed Nicolette’s glassy eyes, darting from person to person in an effort to follow the conversation. She’d suddenly become more animated, even laughing so loudly that the conversation would pause for a moment while everyone looked at her. “Something’s changed,” Carlisle thought as she tried to avoid being obvious as she watched Nicolette.

  It was close to midnight when Josh was the first to say he was ready to turn in. “I think I can speak for the both of us when I say this has been a lovely evening and we hope to do it again soon.”

  “You don’t want to go already, do you?” Nicolette whispered rather loudly to her husband. “The night is still young and the party’s just starting.”

  Josh laughed; it was a reaction Carlisle knew was meant to come off casually even though he was really trying to hide his discomfort at Nicolette’s odd behavioral change over the course of the night. “My wife is a night owl, and I’m afraid I’ve never been able to keep up with those kinds of hours.”

  Carlisle spoke up, wanting to somehow help him ease the transition away from the party. “Well, you drove in from Tuscany this morning; the drive alone must be rather tiring.”

  “It is a bit,” he responded. “It was a long but productive week and, now, I think a long night’s sleep is in order. What do you say, sweetheart?”

  He turned to Nicolette as he stood up, helping her to rise out of her seat. The tall, beautiful woman with the long mane of golden hair almost fell backwards as the heel of her shoe caught on one of the chair legs. Luckily, Josh was still holding onto her arm and was able to prevent her fall.

  “We’ve all had lots of wine,” Eva offered, “that will be me in a while.” And they all laughed, acknowledging that they were more than a little bit tipsy. But, in Carlisle’s mind, something seemed odd. They’d all drunk about the same amount of wine and none of them had exhibited the sudden change in behavior and lack of grace Nicolette had shown.

  Carlisle wasn’t the only one who noticed, either. As she stayed behind to help Eva clean off the table, the tall German woman sheepishly looked around. “I didn’t want to say anything around the others, but I feel like I can talk to you, Carlisle. Didn’t it seem like someone flipped a switch on Nicolette halfway through the evening? I mean, one minute she was quiet and sort of skulking in the background. Then, the next minute she was laughing loudly and constantly interrupting the conversation. It was really odd.”

  “Yes, I noticed the same things,” Carlisle agreed with her new friend. “Maybe she just reacted more strongly to the wine than the rest of us did.”

  “Perhaps,” said Eva. But they both knew there was more to it than that.

  ***

  Josh turned off the light and slid under the covers. Nicolette was already fast asleep. Something was really odd about her behavior tonight. He’d seen it before, but not for more than a year.

  “No, I’m wrong,” he told himself, chalking her loud laughter and sudden clumsiness up to a case of nerves. Josh knew it took his wife a long time to feel comfortable around other people. She’d been doing much better the last few weeks when he was home. A little antsy sometimes, but definitely happier. It was a sure sign that she was settling in. “Maybe soon we can talk about the possibility of a family,” he thought as the night breeze blew through the open window and gently caressed him to sleep.

  Chapter 9

  The days had grown shorter, and the hot summer sun gave way to the clouds and rain that called Verona home throughout the wintertime. It was early December, and the city was beginning to prepare for the holiday season. In the few weeks since she’d invited the other tenants to meet for dinner, Eva had found a new friend in Carlisle. The two shared a love for exploration and enjoyed laughing together about the silly mistakes they made living in another country and culture.

  Nicolette had been invited to go out with them in the late morning or afternoon but always turned them down with the excuse that she’d just woken up. Judging by her appearance, Eva and Carlisle often agreed that she was probably recovering from a late night out. So it was to Eva’s surprise that she happened to bump into Nicolette one morning around 10 o’clock as she came back from the market.

  “Eva, hi. I know I haven’t had much time lately and I feel so bad about that,” Nicolette said rather flatly. “I don’t want you and Carlisle to think I’m avoiding you or anything.”

  “Oh no, we don’t think that at all, Nicolette,” Eva replied as she shifted the weight of her grocery bags, “we know you’re busy.”

  “I have been very busy. But I wanted to make it up to you two. How about if you girls come out with me tonight? There’s always something fun to do,” laughed Nicolette as she tossed her hair uneasily.

  Eva noticed how Nicolette’s collarbones seemed to jut out just a little bit more on her already thin frame. She’s lost weight since we all had dinner together, the young German woman thought before responding. “Well, I think that should be okay. I’ll have to talk to Carlisle, of course.”

  “Oh c’mon now.” Nicolette waved her hand as if brushing off Eva’s last sentence. “Of course it will be okay. Just us girls. I’ll meet you both here in the courtyard around 8pm.”

  Eva said goodbye and continued around to the back of the building to ascend the stairs to her apartment. Every time she thought she had an idea of who Nicolette was, something threw her off-course. The woman was definitely odd, but Eva felt bad for her. After all, she’d come to Verona with her husband, and he was away working most of the time. The least she and Carlisle could do was make an effort to befriend her.

  After putting away the apples, olives, cheese and fresh eggs she’d picked up at the market, Eva called Carlisle to see if the change in plans was okay. Carlisle was as easygoing as ever and agreed they should make an effort to befriend Nicolette. The two decided to cancel their afternoon exploration and take care of other things during the day so they’d have time to go out with Nicolette that night.

  Eva hung up the phone with a smile. Carlisle’s friendship had come along at the perfect time, and her new friend was slowly becoming like a big sister to Eva. Carlisle had helped fill the gaps in her life since she and Marcello weren’t seeing each other as often. “Oh my god, that’s right!” Eva remembered that Marcello had mentioned he would be in Bardolino conducting business. The change of plans with Carlisle gave her the perfect opportunity to hop the bus to Bardolino and surprise Marcello.

  “He’ll be so surprised!” she thought, feeling almost giddy about the opportunity. He’d originally wanted to stop by and see her in Verona, but she’d already made plans with Carlisle. The sudden free time was serendipitous. Eva looked at the well-worn bus schedule tucked into a basket with a stack of magazines her mother had sent from Germany. If she caught the bus around noon, she’d be in Bardolino forty minutes later. She could surprise Marcello at the restaurant where he usually did paperwork and try to convince him to take a little break and a walk with her along the lake. Or, if she was really lucky, she might even be able to seduce him into finding time for a littl
e afternoon delight. Even if she luxuriated in his arms for a while afterwards, Eva would still have plenty of time to return to Verona and get ready for a night out with Carlisle and Nicolette.

  ***

  Marcello pulled the cotton handkerchief out of his pocket and mopped up the tiny beads of sweat that were forming on his forehead. The breeze off Lake Garda was rather chilly that afternoon, but not chilly enough to prevent his nervous perspiration. Carlotta’s family had really tightened the screws since he’d gotten caught “borrowing” money and wound up in the hospital. Since then, they’d watched his every move, checked all his work and ensured that he spent more time with his wife. It didn’t even matter that she no longer wanted to be intimate with him; in fact, she seemed to become more erratic and aggressive each time they were together. Spending more time together had nothing to do with intimacy; it was all about keeping up appearances. Carlotta’s father was pissed that Marcello had taken money from him without asking, and Carlotta was growing increasingly embarrassed by the number of people in their social circle who made a point of noting Marcello’s absence at dinners and other get-togethers.

  The last several weeks had been indescribably stressful for him. Even that morning he’d noticed more gray in the jet-black hair he was so proud of. And the last time he’d been with Eva, he was so stressed out he almost wasn’t able to perform in bed. Thank goodness for her patience and magical touch; he’d have been ashamed to suffer through a scenario like that for the first time in his life.

  Bardolino used to be a place Marcello loved. He had fond memories there from his younger days, as well as from the early years of his marriage. He remembered romancing Carlotta those first few years and the way she rewarded his efforts with her love and passion. They’d made love in the vineyard late at night, then looked up at the stars and talked about their future.

  All the happiness and dreams they’d shared were long since gone. Lately, the beautiful lakeside town and nearby vineyards were nothing more than a painful reminder that his marriage to Carlotta had been nothing more than a business deal that eventually went sour. Like grapes left on the vine too long, the marriage was no longer producing something that profited Carlotta’s family, and they took every opportunity to let Marcello know it.

  He’d wanted so badly to spend time with Eva this afternoon, but when she said she’d already made plans with a friend, he’d stupidly decided to come out to Bardolino. An impromptu meeting with Carlotta’s father had been uneventful and, despite Marcello’s indiscretions, the old man continued to treat him with decency. Marcello walked away with an armload of paperwork to do for his father-in-law when Carlotta stopped him in the driveway. She’d be meeting him at the restaurant in town where he did his paperwork, she informed him. He said he was happy to talk with her there but she cut him off, letting him know it had nothing to do with talking. They needed to be seen together like the happy, loving couple they were supposed to be. “I want nothing to do with you in private, but you will make me the center of your attention when we’re out in public,” she’d spat at him.

  Despite the chill in the air, Marcello chose to sit at a sheltered outside table while working on the paperwork to let the fresh lake air calm his nerves. Carlotta’s behavior had become even more aggressive; add that to all the other difficult situations he’d faced in this town lately, and it was no wonder he was sweating so profusely as others walked by bundled in overcoats.

  Marcello got the waiter’s attention and ordered a glass of white wine. It wasn’t even noon yet, but it didn’t matter. Maybe the wine would help him calm down. He stared out toward the gentle waves rocking the boats lining the dock and thought about Eva’s gentle caresses. He knew he’d behaved badly with her. Shuffling his feet under the table in shame, Marcello wished there was a way he could make it up to her. What he wouldn’t give to divorce Carlotta and spend the rest of his life making Eva happy. It was what she deserved, and he longed to be with her in a way he’d never been willing to admit before. But that was never going to happen, and Marcello knew it. Carlotta’s family would kill him before they’d allow him to shame them with a divorce.

  Sadness washed over him, and he removed the handkerchief from his pocket to wipe his brow again. There was nothing worse in the world than being stuck in a bad situation, knowing it was likely to get worse, and being helpless to do anything about it. The only thing that could make things worse for Marcello was if the knot in the pit of his stomach turned out to be the warning of worse things to come.

  ***

  The last swig of coffee in the bottom of the cup was just enough to wash down the birth control pill sitting in its packet on the table. Nicolette popped the pill into her mouth and washed it down with the coffee as she cradled the phone against her ear with her other hand. Josh was on the phone rattling on about the scene they were filming that day, and Nicolette half-listened as she stared into the open wardrobe and considered her outfit for the evening.

  “Mmm-hmm” she responded when Josh asked if she was going to spend time with Carlisle and Eva as he’d suggested. “We’re getting together for lunch this afternoon,” she lied.

  Her husband continued rambling on until it was time for them to resume filming. “I’m really looking forward to getting back to you this weekend,” he said in closing. “I’d like to spend a little more time trying to start a family with my beautiful wife.”

  “Oh, me too, sweetheart,” Nicolette replied as she poured a small amount of white powder onto the clean kitchen tabletop. “I’m looking forward to that, too.”

  “Finally,” she muttered to herself as she hung up the phone and neatened up the thin white powdery line with the single-edged razor blade. In one fluid motion, she laid a slender finger alongside her left nostril and closed it. Bending close to the powder, Nicolette inhaled sharply; in a second, it was gone. She brushed her finger across her nose to remove stray powdery crystals as a rush of energy coursed through her veins. Feelings of euphoria and invincibility resurrected themselves in her mind.

  “Now, I’m ready to start my day,” the thin blonde said to her reflection in the mirror. She pushed the spaghetti straps over her shoulders and let the nightgown fall to the floor. Turning to the left and right as she stood naked in front of the full-length mirror, Nicolette tried to imagine what she might look like if she were pregnant. She ran a hand over her flat stomach and looked at her perfect figure from all angles.

  She stepped away from the mirror and pulled the sheath dress and jacket she’d chosen for the daytime out of the wardrobe. As the dress came down over her head, she pulled up the side zipper and stepped in front of the mirror again. Nicolette faced the mirror, resting her hands on the hip bones that jutted out from her body. “No, there’s no way,” she said out loud. “There’s no way I’m getting pregnant now that I’ve finally been able to get a little fun back in my life. I’ve given up enough already. Now it’s my turn.”

  ***

  The crisp December breeze gently brushed Carlisle’s hands as her fingers moved rapidly over the keyboard. Her new story was coming along well, and the words continued to flow. Early on, she’d determined that this one would be dedicated to the memory of Will and Anna, and she often sensed them around her when she wrote.

  There were many days when the sadness of losing them crept back in but, even though it still hurt, remembering no longer felt like a dagger plunging deep into her heart. Carlisle identified heavily with the main character in the novel she was writing…a woman in her thirties who had everything going for her except a family. As she unraveled her character’s feelings and thoughts with each writing session, Carlisle found herself reflecting on some of the same things. Was it her destiny to experience wonderful things and places but have no one to share them with?

  She couldn’t imagine betraying the memories of Will and Anna by entering into another relationship. No, she wouldn’t become involved with anyone, she decided. Yet, the subject continued to dig its way out of the recesses of he
r mind and find its way back to the forefront every time she sat down to work on her novel.

  “You’re identifying too much with your characters,” Carlisle warned herself as she glanced out the window. “Let yourself heal and start to enjoy life,” she thought out loud. “Some people are just meant to be alone.”

  ***

  “Due biglietti,” Charles repeated to himself slowly. His Italian was coming along slowly but surely, thanks to Sofia. But he’d taught himself how to ask for two tickets so he could surprise Sofia with concert tickets at the Arena di Verona. The famous Roman arena had been standing in what was now the center of the city for 2,000 years. Roman spectators had once viewed games and shows there, but it was now open for tourists year-round and the host to several famous operas during the summertime. Although opera season had long since ended for the year, a special holiday concert was scheduled in the arena, which Charles thought was a perfect surprise for Sofia.

  Over the past several weeks, her monthly visits had increased to every other week, and Charles had grown especially fond of her. Being around her brought out the best in him, and her presence gently coaxed forth a side of him he’d refused to acknowledge for so long. He’d spent many years dismissing thoughts of love, romance and the idea that there might be someone to share his life with. At first, it was frightening to allow those thoughts to wander back into his mind. But as time wore on, they became more familiar and comfortable, just as Sofia’s presence in his life had become.

  As his confidence and bravery became fortified by her gentle encouragement and patient support, Charles found himself realizing that being friends with Sofia was no longer enough for him. He wanted more than just her friendship and longed to see if there might be the chance for them to have a life together. The plan was to ask her to be his girlfriend at the concert.

  Charles walked down Via Settembre toward the Piazza delle Erbe, which had been transformed from a regular daily open-air market into a Christmas market. Tiny twinkling lights sparkled from each station, and the strains of festive holiday music danced from the radio where the man who sold t-shirts during tourist season was tidying his display of Verona-themed Christmas ornaments. The two gentlemen’s gazes met, and they smiled and nodded to acknowledge one another.